You May think I'm Crazy

A couple of years ago I heard of a wife who had a life size cut out of her husband who was deployed and she would sit it at the dinner table in his chair every night so that her kids were sure to remember Daddy while he was away. Well when I heard this I thought, now I understand making sure the kids remember and everything but a cut out of Daddy isn't that a little extreme? Well today I am apologizing to whoever that woman was and I am eating my words.
 One of my main goals during this deployment is to make sure MaKenna knows who her Daddy is the first time she sees him in person. So we have a picture of Zach in MaKenna's room that we talk to everyday. And I am hiding my face as I type this next confession, b/c you will think that I am weird, We give the picture a kisses. We read his recorded books everyday, and I have sent more books to Zach for him to video himself reading. We mark off our day on our calendar everyday. We practice saying DaDa.
   I am constantly telling MaKenna what her Daddy would be doing if he were here, and what he would say to different situations. And yes I know what he would say, there I have been multiple times when I get to talk to Zach and I tell him about a particular situation he says the exact same thing that I told MaKenna he would. For example, "MaKenna does Mommy need this Dress? Well Daddy would say... yes but it!" :) On that note I constantly tell her what an amazing man her Daddy is and how much he loves us and spoils mommy, and how he is going to spoil her when he gets home. We plan what all we are going to do when Daddy gets home and what it will be like to be back together as a family again. Most of these conversations are when we are working around the house and she is in my sling (toting her in this thing is usually how I get housework and other things accomplished) So facing forward in her sling I will tell her that Daddy said to give her  Kisses She will look up with those adorable eyes and I will kiss her on the forehead, I will say "that's a Daddy kiss" and she will grin from ear to ear look back forward and then look up for another one. It is the sweetest thing.
   Some people may find it depressing all of the things that we do may seem just like reminders that he isn't here with us but for some unknown reason it gives us/me some form of comfort and it seems to lessen the physical distance between us.
   So yes you may consider me crazy now b.c I probably would have before. I tell myself at least I haven't gone as far as getting a life size cut out of him but then again maybe that is just b/c MaKenna and I don't eat at the Dinner table since she drinks milk and eats baby food and I am not cooking just for me.

Giving Daddy "Loves"

And just look at this big girl sitting up!!